Author Archives: Alexandra Glossner

my love, my life

We have, unexpectedly, decided to wean. We are taking cues from our girl, & while she’s ready, & I am not. Up until this morning, I had been down to one pump a day when I could stand it. It wasn’t consistent. I’ve tried everything I could possibly think to make even that more tolerableContinue reading “my love, my life”

Believe in Belief

It’s December 16, 2022. We should have a 3-year-old, or almost 3-year-old right now. And, to be quite honest, I’m having a lot of complicated feelings about that this year. Many people, while in the thick of trying to grow our family, told us that when we had our baby in our arms & livesContinue reading “Believe in Belief”

“I hope that my daughter…”

“Here’s to strong women,” indeed. May know them. May we be them May we raise them. <— this part When we found out we were miraculously (scientifically) pregnant, I was ecstatic.  Terrified, but totally elated.  Dec. 9th, when we heard that heartbeat, we rushed home, heads spinning, hearts soaring. We celebrated. We breathed. The nextContinue reading ““I hope that my daughter…””

The lovers, the dreamers, & me…

Today it’s Thursday, January 27th. But I’ve had this tab open on my MacBook for 48 hours. I have been positively stagnant. Totally blocked up. On how to get started. On what to share. This hasn’t happened to me on this journey. Not since I’ve been sharing for a little over a year. It was,Continue reading “The lovers, the dreamers, & me…”

There isn’t much more to say about it.

The thing about death, grief, pain, hardship, or tragedy is that you have a groundswell of support right away.  Because that’s the RIGHT thing to do. But after the immediate influx of love, it disappears.  Because the hard part isn’t right away.  No. Not at all. The hard part comes after the dust of itContinue reading “There isn’t much more to say about it.”

All day, all shit

Thanks to everyone who has reached out. I don’t really have much of a capacity to talk & frankly I don’t want to. We’re incredibly disappointed – understatement of the century – & feel let down by the universe & whatever else is up or out there. I believe in the Sun, moon, & starsContinue reading “All day, all shit”

Oh, simple thing where have you gone?

I don’t have it in me to write much of a blog post. Or do anything but lay in my bed, cry, & stare blankly into the void. I don’t know if this is even coherent. But, here this is anyway. What a super, duper fun way to kick off Pregnancy & Infant Loss AwarenessContinue reading “Oh, simple thing where have you gone?”

This Could Be the End of Everything

Tuesday, September 7th. This could be the end of everything. Everything as we know it, that is. 38 months, collectively, of trying (& failing) to conceive. THIRTY. EIGHT. MONTHS. We tried for 9 months before finally getting pregnant. That miracle ended in miscarriage by our first appointment. When we were supposed to hear the heartbeat.Continue reading “This Could Be the End of Everything”